Divorce Lawyers' Guide to Staying Married

From Hollywood to Bollywood: Cultural Differences Shape Weddings

by Ashley

Bollywood weddings are getting a lot of press these days.  Just last week Elizabeth Hurley and her new husband Arun Nayar tied the knot twice-- once in England and again in a Hindu ceremony in Mumbai.  The actress and software CEO raised more than a few eyebrows during the Indian celebration.  According to one accuser, the couple flaunted Hindu laws by drinking alcohol, wearing leather shoes, and kissing in front of the cameras.  According to a New Zealand gossip magazine, Stuff, the couple has been charged under section 295 A of the Indian Penal Code.  Hurley's new father-in-law, Vinod Nayar, has even agreed to testify against the couple.  If convicted, Hurley and Arun Nayar could face up to three years in prison.

A source close to Hurley said that she "went absolutely ballistic when she found out what Arun's family had been saying about her. As far as she is concerned she never wants to see Arun's father or stepmother again."  Vinod Nayar has publically disowned his son, complaining that he and his wife were treated like "second-class" citizens at the event.

Two Bollywood stars are also tying the knot in a lavish, and high profile, ceremony.  The BBC reports that 400 guards have been hired to keep prying eyes away from Aishwarya Rai, a former Miss World, and her fiance, fellow actor and rising star Abhishek Bachchan.  In addition to the guards, a temporary wooden structure has been built around the bungalow to obscure the view, and the families have asked neighbors whose upper floors have a view of the bungalow not to allow cameras or reporters in.

Although their wedding invitations were four pages long, and the bride will wear custom gowns, elaborate jewelry, and saris brought in from Varanasi, Hindu traditions are being observed.  The BBC explains:

The festivities will begin on Wednesday with the sangeet (music evening) at the Bachchan residence.

Thursday will be the henna night - when henna is applied to the bride's hands. That will reportedly be held at Ms Rai's residence in Bandra, with the henna being brought in from Rajasthan.

The couple got engaged in January.  The future Mrs. Bachchan said that she has always loved her soon to be husband.

Web Weddings-A Great Way To Invite Annoying Relatives to Share Your Big Day!

by Wendy Jaffe

Why didn't I think of this? A company (and I am not vouching for this particular company in any way shape or form) called Web Cast My Wedding provides support to those who want to credit for "inviting" annoying Aunt Trudy without having to risk her ruining The Big Day. Of course, it is also a way to invite perfectly wonderful friends and relatives to the ceremony who might be too far away to participate, or who are otherwise unavailable at the moment of the ceremony. I'm thinking that we should take this one step further. How about not having our future spouse at the actual ceremony-we can just webcast him or her in? This is sure to prevent any of those wedding day arguments that seem to arise when two sets of parents and a nervous bride and groom enter the same room.

Of course this raises the question of webcast gift etiquette but that is a question for a future blog.

Jolie Navigates Challenges with New In-Laws

by Ashley

A British online magazine, FemaleFirst.co.uk, reports that Angelina Jolie and her not-quite in-laws are still learning how to relate to each other.  The actress, who gave birth to a baby girl a few months ago, refuses to dress the new baby in clothing Pitt's parents purchased as gifts.

Apparently, the clothing is pink and "frilly"-- not at all Jolie's style.  A source explained that "Jolie has her own opinions about how to dress her children, she doesn't want them looking like dolls." 

This decision, however, has left the Pitts fuming.  To add to the mix, Pitt's parents were apparently extremely close to his ex-wife, Jennifer Aniston.  Hopefully, Jolie will  be able to navigate the relationship with Pitt's parents, as in-laws are frequently a factor in divorce.

Link to FemaleFirst.co.uk story

How to Parent a Divorcing Child

by Ashley

Divorceinfo.com, a website dedicated to exploring all aspects of pre and post-divorce life, contains an article on how to parent a divorcing child.  There are so many opinions about the children of divorce, that one does not often think about the effects of divorce on adult siblings and parents (the child's grandparents-- after all).  Questions that might come up during your child's divorce include:

• Will they move back home?  For how long?  Will they bring their children?
• How will you maintain contact with your grandchildren?
• Can you (and should you) offer financial support?
• Feelings of guilt, shame, sadness, and deep grief.  Since many children have a hard time telling their parents about a divorce, you may experience shock and surprise.
• How will you provide emotional support?

These questions are not always easy to answer, and like all emotional situations the strategies will be different for each person in each circumstance.  Most importantly, the author points out, you cannot blame yourself for your child's divorce.  Instead, focus on helping your child heal and grow during this tough time.

Link to divorceinfo.com's article

Invasive Parents Part of Nick-n-Jess' Break Up

by Ashley

In this month's Rolling Stone Nick Lachey speaks frankly about the end of his marriage with Jessica Simpson.  Today's USA Today has a preview of the article, in which Lachey discusses the presence of his father-in-law in his relationship with Simpson. 

Like many couples, Lachey believes that any of Simpson's (yet unconfirmed) adultery was a result of other, deeper, problems in the marriage.  Of course, not all couples deal with the stress of a reality TV show.  Says Lachey:

Jessica and I began playing these parts (on Newlyweds) even when we were by ourselves. It became a really blurred line. There was a question about what truly was our reality.

Lots of marriages do, however, have to deal with invasive in-laws.  Lachey remarks that although Jessica's father/manager was a major influence in their marriage, he was not the end issue.

Link to USA Today article